Opening the Door to Conversations About Sexuality and Pregnancy

One of the most important things that any parent can do is to talk with their kids - teens especially - about sex and pregnancy. The challenge, of course, is that most parents are uncomfortable talking about sex with their teens - and even less comfortable with bringing up the topic of teen pregnancy with their daughters.

If you’ve been looking for a chance to bring up sex and pregnancy with your teen but don’t know how to get started, here are some tips that will help to simplify the process:

  • Make sure that your teen knows that he or she can come to you; when your teens know that they can approach you with their questions, you’ll find that you are not the only one starting a conversation.
  • Have an idea about what you want to say before you try to say it. When you have an understanding about your values and your feelings and you have information about sex and pregnancy.
  • Be as accurate as you can be - both when answering questions and when you are talking about sex organs and behaviors. If you don’t know the answer to a question that your teen asks, be honest about it and look for the answer - possibly together.
  • When you talk with your teen about sex and pregnancy, you’re going to want to be sure that you are respecting your teen’s privacy; it’s important not to pry. By creating an open environment, your teens will be able to come to you when they are ready. Of course, that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t ask your teen questions about what he or she knows, understands or thinks about sex.
  • If your teen asks questions about sex, don’t look for a deeper meaning; sometimes a question really is just a question.
  • Take the time to understand the pressures that teens are feeling in regard to sex; you’ll find that news stories, TV shows and movies and talk within your community can all give you a sense of what your teen is experiencing and can be great points for starting a conversation with your teen about sex and pregnancy.
  • Recognize that while you have values that relate to teen sex and pregnancy, there are people who have other perspectives. This is particularly true when you are talking with your teen about sexual orientation, pregnancy, birth control and even prostitution.
  • Be sure that you are talking with your teens about birth control and preventing sexually transmitted diseases as well as relationships.

By talking with your teen about sex and pregnancy, you will help him or her be safe and healthy - and to recognize that their experiences are normal. Remember, simply trying to use scare tactics to convince your teens not to have sex is not going to be effective.